MESS | The ATL Wigga gets her FIRED UP on

The wigga Barbie Kim Zolciak of Bravo's smash reality show Real Housewives of Atlanta has reached a new high in tawdry publicity. We all knew the wig-toting celebutante couldn't hold a note between those buoys she calls breasts. But that's what auto-tune if for, right? Despite the lame chorus, this track wouldn't see the light of day on MTV 4's Deep Dish House.

Tardy For The Party (Mix) - Kim Zolciak

411 | Fiore murder suspect found dead

411 | Oprah hosts Houston as season's first guest

90skd | C-Bear & Jamal

Who cares if his two hits were basically the same song....Tone Loc was that dude.

PBP | THIS is reality

Richard Hatch, remember him, the naked winner of the first Survivor. Well apparently he's broke and bitchin' about it in an exclusive Today Show interview with Matt Lauer. After serving jail time for tax evasion charges (he forgot to mention the milli he won on national TV to the IRS), he is serving the rest of his 4-year term @ home, penniless. It's a recession! You ain't the only one struggling.

'00 | Eve's great, no matter where she goes

Had a Disney Channel flashback today. I believe this may have been Tyra Banks theatrical debut. LOL Before Lindsay went loco, she was an adorable ginger-haired girl who needed a friend. Conveniently she wishes her black Barbie to come to life and bring happiness to her miserably bleak life. Great for a 90skd, but the '09 adult is sensing some frank parallels to the plot today. An African goddess - simple and subservient - nurtures a lonely white girl and her widowed father. Woooow. But I digress. Here's the best part of the film where Eve sings her theme song. Oh, yeah, she sings for the white people, too.

8709 Special | ABDC Week 2

Last night I found myself screaming through my Twitter as the judges thrice said goodbye to Artistry in Motion. Not only did they beast their performance "Diva," they had the best routine that night, only second to the triumphant Afroborike. I feel like this is a total cover-up, C-O-N-spiracy, to rid the show of real talent for flash, glitz, and something fresh (Vogue Evolution). Here are my reasonings:

• First of all, I was a little perturbed that it was a Beyonce episode so my disdain my stem from that bias. Don't get me wrong, Sasha Fierce is definitely the B to beat right now, BUT her videos have not had enough time to marinate as dance classics. Jackson was a 1st season choice because he's a legend; and Janet and Elliott were legit choices in season two because their videos have had time to become staples in pop culture. The only videos of Mrs. Carter's I'd list as dance classics would be "Crazy in Love" and the just-released-last-year "Single Ladies." There should be some year requirement for any artist video challenge. They could have at least had an Aaliyah dance challenge being that she had her own unique style and her videos are modern day classics prior to Beyonce's rise to solo stardom. From One in A Million to Are You That Somebody, the late Haughton would have been a better choice to tribute.
• Second, and closely related to the first point, is that Beyonce's music doesn't translate to hip-hop dance crews too well. You had those that worked: Artisty's "Diva" with the Bangladesh beat; Afroborike's "Beautiful Liar"; and, even Beat Ya Feet Kings' go-go got off to the Rich Harriosn "Crazy in Love." And then you had those that didn't; Massive Monkey's awkward "Work it Out"; We Are Heroes' too short and simple "Single Ladies"; Rhythm City's "Sweet Dreams"; and, Southern Movement's nice but odd "Jumpin, Jumpin'." I didn't see anyhting that wowed me until the sudden death portion of the show.
• Third, the show's pairing of the last two crews songs was ironic. They pitted two perfectly sewn routines against each other, giving Afroborike the better with the Latin-infused "Beautiful Liar" which calls for silky hips and salsa-dancing. The whole show is rigged.

I'll be sure to tune in next Sunday, but I won't do it happily at all.

411 | 'DWTS' cast announced, debuts Sept. 21.

Not that I'll be watching or anything. (Heroes will be on, and I never liked the show anyway.) But I put my money on the sexy underrated Mya. I mean she has experience. I know ya'll remember this. I'd say she's the closest thing to a true follower in Janet's footsteps. Too bad no one will give hear a chance to be great.

Mya - My Love Is Like...Wo

SICK | Usain Bolt sets new WR - 9.58

Tyson Gay is second-fastest man in the world with 9.71.

Channel Surfin' | Heroes Vol. 5 : "Redemption"

It's been a minute since NBC's mutant saga occupied my Monday evenings. The last I can remember, the struggling series found its characters running for their lives as flying Petrelli brother Nathan mandated a APB on all people with talents, which pitted him against Peter and the likes of Matt Parkman, Hiro and Ando, HRG and Claire, and Sylar. Now it seems another threat, perhaps one from the past, arises. The trailer presents this new group as being outcasts of both communities, similar to Stan Lee's the Brotherhood. We'll see if this new development recaptures the same magic as the first, and best, season did with viewers. Two-hour season premiere debuts Sept. 21 @ 8 p.m.

411 | Omarosa to become a minister

90skd | Gak!

Remember how simple us kids were entertained? Just give us some high-priced silly putty and we'd be satisfied. Batteries not necessary. Nickelodeon ruled the world.

8709 Special | ABDC 4 - Refelctions of 1st show.

Just finished viewing the competition for this upcoming season. And they didn't play, season 4 is something totally different. Here are my favorites after seeing the show.

Best performance of the night goes to : Rhythm City

Top 3

• Southern Movement - These creators of hick-hop from Nashville had one segment during their first show that surprised me...BUT when it came to sudden death they killed it. They'll definitely be ones to watch.
• Rhythm City - Had the cleanest routine of the night. My favorite so far. Very versatile.
• We Are Heroes - Different and all lady baby. I feel they're choreography will surprise like Fanny Pak.

The Rest

• Massive Monkeys - Its a given - B-Boys always tend to hold their own in the competition. With the Boogie Bots being that one exception.
• Artistry in Motion - Love that SYTYCD's Donyelle is gettin' another shot. I just wish it wasn't so reminiscent of the unfortunate demises of both Fly Khicks and Fish N' Chicks.
• Vogue Evolution - Very...different. A definite first for television unless you're watching an old Sylvester video. Its going to be interesting.
• Beat Ya Feet Kings - Was expecting a lil more from them, and was a little disappointed. Definitely the ones who will need the most growth.
• AfroBroike - Not sure how I feel about them. We'll see how they manage the challenges though. Could surprise everybody. But I don't expect much since I almsot forgot to add them to the list.

Channel Surfin' | Everybody dance NOW

The time has come! New Night. New Time. New Crews. A new winner will be dubbed America's Best Dance Crew. For more hit up mtv.com. Here's a snippet of my favorite crews that are gearing up for a new season. Subject to change as the show progresses. It all goes down @ 9 p.m. Fr3sh - the KabaModern crew Beat Ya Feet Kings - Stand up D.C.! I still wish to conquer footwork. We Are Heroes - May be this year's Fanny Pak and a possible winning all-girl crew Rhythm City - Dope

GNR | Diddy, I wanna sing!!!!!

I had never seen this performance before, but it sums up my sentiments of Cassie 100%. Diddy must have promised The Talented Mr. Leslie keys to the city to co-sign this trick.

MESS | Neckline Slimmer

Is there a subliminal message in this and other similar products. If it is I think it's saying sluts loose weight and look younger....instantly.

GNR | Redundant

.......SMH........

Channel Surfin' | Salute Your Shorts

When child programming was smart and funny. Classic right here. Never noticed how much the black chick looks like a Destiny's Child? "It makes me wanna fart!" LMAO!

411 | Paula Abdul to leave American Idol

That is all.

411 | MTV VMA Nominees Announced

September 13th is the set date to see who gets the coveted Moonmen this year. But by the looks of the nominations (& the host) I won't be tuning in at all. Eminem and Kanye rank the most nominations with four each, including nods for Video of the Year with "We Made You" and "Love Lockdown." Really!?!?! I've seen a 1/4 of Em's video since its debut, and West had much better videos and singles with "Heartless" and "Welcome to Heartbreak." The only vid worthy of this title is Bey's "Single Ladies" which should win. There hadn't been a video that exciting in pop culture since Soulja Boy's "Crank That."

Other dishonorable mentions:

• Best Choreography nominees include PCD's taudry remake of Slumdog's "Jai Ho;" and, Kristina DeBarge for "Goodbye." WTF. This will go to Mrs. Carter as well.

• Best Male Video gathers 2/4 of the Rap Pack ("D.O.A." & "Live Your Life"), Mr. West and Marshall, and finally Ne-Yo for "Miss Independent." No "Pretty Wings" or even "Blame It?" I don't understand. Or maybe I'm not suppose to.

If I ran the VMAs, it'd look a little something like this:

Video of the Year

• Mims "Move (If U Wanna)" - He may not have the lyrical prowess of Em or West, but the video was a staple of this year. Very different.

• Kanye West "Heartless" - The most rap-like track off of 808s & Heartbreak, West animated his broken heart into a Dear Jane letter to his ex.

• Beyonce "Single Ladies" - WINNER. Everybody from Justin Timberlake to Joe Jonas impersonated the video of the year.

• Lady Gaga "Beautiful Dirty Rich" My favorite video from our gen's Madonna.

• Maxwell "Pretty Wings" - Eight years out of the game, and one single covets you a #1 debut. Did this even get MTV airplay? He'd also be nominated for Best Male Video.

Other thoughts: Lady GaGa should get Best New Artist unless Drake wheels in with a steal. Britney Spears shouldn't anything because of the goof of last year winning VOTY. P-UH-LEASE.